Amber Rose’s Op-Ed On Why She DGAF About Other People’s Opinions Is The Best Thing You’ll Read All Day

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Ya know, perhaps Kanye West could learn a thing or two from Amber Rose. We’re not talking about music or creativity, we’re talking about how to treat people. While the Amber Rose – Kanye West – Wiz Khalifa feud has become a heated talking point lately, when you read about the origins of this recent beef and one person’s reaction in particular (Kanye’s), you get the impression there is still a lot of hatred on his part toward Amber.

What’s most surprising to us is how level-headed Amber is. We have a feeling it has to do with her sense of self-empowerment and learning that there is so much more to life that celebrity feuds. She has become an outspoken feminist determined to break down stigma around slut-shaming in particular.

Her Slut Walk event in Los Angeles has given a much needed celebrity figure-head for this epidemic where women are still to this day shamed for the clothes they wear, the sexual decisions they made, hell, even when they get raped or assaulted they are slut-shamed. It is a dangerous cultural trend that decisively absolves perpetrators of any wrong-doing, while also affirming that a man’s decision over his sexuality is still something considered “strong” or “powerful” (or worse, “normal”).

By doing this, she is giving women a voice, who are fed up with the cliched ways women and their sexuality has become a place of condemnation in the media and entertainment. We believe she has become a role model for a generation of women who care about movements like the slut-shaming, free the nipple and female empowerment in general.

In an op-ed for Time magazine, Amber wrote a great essay about why she stopped caring what other people think and why other women should too.

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“Ever since high school, I’ve been called a slut. All the boys were attracted to me—that wasn’t my fault! Then, when I started getting famous, the shaming got even worse. All these messed up stories came out about me, and I was like, ‘That’s not true! I’m not that kind of girl!’ But even things I had done—things a man would never be judged for—got me lots of hate,” she began.

The slut-shaming she experienced as an adult was far worse than her teenage years. After divorcing rapper husband Wiz Khalifa, with whom she has a child, she said when she would go on dates, the media would be quick to shame her, but not Wiz.

“So when I went on a date, I’m a whore, and when he’s piling girls in a car, he’s the man? There’s something wrong here,” she said.

After getting sick of constantly having to defend her actions, and point out to fans on social media who would attack her how wrong they were, she did a 180 and decided to just not give a f**k anymore.

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“I realized that I can’t make everyone believe. And I can’t talk to everyone and tell them who I really am. They’re still going to have their own opinions. If you know me, you love me. If you don’t know me, you might love me, but you might not—and that’s cool. And you know what? Now I sleep like a baby at night,” she said.

She got to a point where she realized, life is just too short to continue making other people happy all the time. It’s a trap many of us fall into, whether we are in the public eye or not. With all the predetermined categories for women in society, to exist beyond those can be too threatening for some, in turn we get bullied, shamed, abused, and derided for the decisions we make.

Amber believes conforming is what stops us from truly living out our lives the way we are destined to.

“When you care too much, you’re not living at your full potential. When you really stop caring about what people say, that’s when you really start living. It’s such an amazing feeling. It’s about loving who you are, owning who you are and knowing that it’s O.K. to live your life how you want to live it. It’s so cool to think that I might help women think about who they want to be and then encourage them to be that person with no remorse. I want to help women just be happy in their own skin,” she said.

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After their recent public feud, although Kim Kardashian stayed away from it publicly, she finally inserted herself into the conversation by meeting up with Amber and snapped a selfie with the “badass bitch” for all her fans to see. It could be seen as a pivotal moment in this viral story, and in a sense it showed what happens when women come together.

When you think about it, if there is any other celebrity in this entire world who understands being shamed for her appearance and choices, it’s Kim K. She was mercilessly shamed while being pregnant, and throughout her career on Reality TV and fashion has been held up as the beacon of what is wrong with our culture. It is a rather unfair statement to make, considering she has built an incredible empire from all the media attention she started getting after her infamous sex tape with Ray J. PS, where is Ray J today?…

There was a meme floating around social media and the internet which callously declared “In a world full of Kardashians, be an Audrey [Hepburn] or a Diana [Princes of Wales]. That is slut-shaming at its finest! Basically, the creators of the graphics are subbing in anyone they deem “classy,” therefore implying that the Kardashians and Jenners are somehow less than. We prefer the version which was shared by Ariana Grande which pointed out the internalized misogyny in such a meme.

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It’s an important message to make, and by Amber choosing to meet up with Kim Kardashian in the hope it will squash any bitch fight rumors, perhaps their legions of female fans will follow suit. We as women have an opportunity to really make a difference in the way the world sees and treats women, and it has to start with awareness of how we treat each other, no matter how we disagree or live our lives differently.

“Before you judge someone—especially another woman—put yourself in her shoes and also look at your past. That’s what a lot of women fail to do. They’re so quick to call another girl names, but it’s like: You know what? There may have been a time where you looked back and said, ‘I probably shouldn’t have done that.’ Does that make you a ho? No, it makes you a human,” she concluded.

We could all learn a thing or two about adoption the IDGAF attitude toward society when it seeks to shame and condemn us for who we are, what we look like and what we do. The more we can take a stand for ourselves and encourage others to do the same, perhaps we can finally break down the cultural restrictions and stigma placed on women, borne of out centuries of us being treated as subordinates or less than equal. We need celebrities like Amber marching to the beat of her own drum.

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