Building A Better Relationship With Yourself In The New Year

By Cynthia Williams

This year was a big year for me. I had probably the most growth as a person that I have yet to experience in my adult life. I grew as a person, a wife, a mom, and a practitioner. 

This growth, this change, has calmed me and made me more driven at the same time. My focus is sharper, my thoughts are clearer, my decision making is strong, and I just don’t give AF about what anyone thinks.

These areas in my life that I am continually working on, I also work on daily with my clients. I am a big believer that I can’t ask others to do the things that I am not willing to do myself. I walk the walk. 

I work with mostly women in my profession. I help these women identify triggers of stress, frustration, doubt, insecurities, and fears of failure. I then help to redirect and create new mindsets, thought patterns, and habits so that they can move past these issues and not only reach their goals, but more importantly, sustain those goals.

The areas in life that take time, work, and energy to build, like confidence, integrity, discipline, and mental strength also require consistent practice to maintain. 

One of my favorite quotes to tell clients is, “You will not be able to change the triggers in your life, but you can change your reaction to those triggers.” 

I work together with my clients, to help build small walls, one brick at a time between triggers and reactions. The biggest piece is just identifying the triggers. Once you know to expect how a trigger will make you feel, you are then in control. You have the upper hand. You can show your cards or fold. It is completely up to you. 

It takes time, practice, and patience to build the skills to create new reactions, thought patterns, and mindsets around your triggers. What’s the old saying? “Practice makes perfect.” 

There are six areas of health: emotional, physical, social, financial, intellectual, and spiritual. We have to consistently work at each one of these. I truly believe you must be healthy in all of these areas to live a vibrant and fulfilled life. 

Each one of these six areas is subjective and relative to the individual. What is spiritual health to one is not to another. There is no place for judgment either when it comes to these six areas of health, because judgment is an unhealthy trigger that elicits poor behavior, mindsets,  and thought patterns. Stay in your lane and focus on you, because we all have enough on our own plates to work on. 

Self reflection is the starting point with my clients. Each week, they are required to fill out a check-in that asks them questions of reflection during the last 7 days. They evaluate stress, sleep, activity levels, energy levels, libido, and mood in regards to how it helped them progress or hindered progress for those 7 days. 

Each week, they get a little more intune with their body and mind. They actually start to listen to themselves and start identifying what has been holding them back, what they need to change, what they are really good at and need to do more of, what they enjoy, and how all of these things combined truly makes them feel. 

This is so powerful for creating new thought patterns and, more importantly, confidence! Building confidence leads to better decision making, discipline, and doing more of what it takes to grab life by the balls and GO! 

My biggest takeaway for you today, is to really look at you. If you want to be the healthiest version of you yet, change your mindset, thought patterns, and habits to reflect what your lifelong goals are. 

Evaluate yourself and how you react in situations, so you can do better the next time. 

Stop your thoughts of judgment about someone, and redirect that energy. Judgment is a reflection of an insecurity. Figure that out and work on it to build your confidence. 

Think twice before participating in unhealthy behaviors or activities that you regret the next day. Why do you continue to do it? 

Evaluate your peers. Are they successful, healthy, and create a desire in you to be better? If not, move on. 

Some of these changes may be hard and uncomfortable to make. But growth and comfort do not coexist. 

My best wishes to you all, and may 2023 be your year. 

Cynthia Williams, Integrative Nutritional Practitioner, specializes in women’s hormone and gut health while achieving weight loss. With a background in occupational therapy, Cynthia has worked in the wellness industry for over 15 years with hundreds of clients. She aims to create a network that allows people more avenues and accessibility to reach health and wellness goals. Cynthia’s programs teach women how to live a healthy, sustainable lifestyle with a focus on education, including extensive tools for success in getting healthy.

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