In a news-saturated, politics-dominated, social media-oriented world where everyone is free to express their opinions in numerous ways, it can be difficult to hear one another. We spend all our time communicating, but how much time do we spend actually listening? And is the art of listening something we need to re-learn from scratch?
One woman who is on a mission to help us all learn how to listen more and talk less, is Christine Miles, founder of The Listening Path® system and movement, and author of the award-winning book ‘What Is It Costing You Not To Listen?’ Drawing from her 25+ years experience in education, psychology and her expertise in emotional intelligence, Christine noticed something key – how poor listening sabotages relationships and organizations. Today, she is on a mission to help people listen to understand, rather than simply hear. Christine believes this understanding will help us better innovate, solve problems, and create meaningful connections.
The Listening Path® is a system that teaches the art of listening as a foundational skill for success in any role or industry. The program caters to two primary audiences: educators and businesses. Traditional approaches to teaching listening—such as emphasizing eye contact or attention—have failed to produce meaningful results.
The Listening Path® Program, developed for Grades 3 to 5, offers a different approach. The students learn listening skills through animated, fun, and interactive videos. The overarching goal is to improve students’ listening to positively impact their behavior, comprehension, and social skills. Parents and caregivers can also participate, reinforcing an effective method of learning.
With The Listening Path® Program, Christine hopes that listening will be viewed as the most powerful form of communication. She believes that this is one step forward toward preparing future generations to navigate a technology-driven world with empathy and understanding.
The Listening Path® helps companies enhance their culture and outcomes by teaching employees to listen to understand through Mastering the Listening Path. Emotional intelligence has become a defining trait of success in the corporate world. The program’s customized workshops enable businesses to learn why listening matters for leadership, sales, and problem-solving and how to create a culture of empathy and connection.
In a world that is geared toward division and disconnect, we were very excited at the opportunity to speak with Christine about the creation of The Listening Path movement, why listening is her superpower, and how building emotional intelligence from a young age is a tool that will set kids up for a lifetime of success.
Why do you think it is so hard for us to listen to one another these days, and what are the biggest barriers?
In our modern, fast-paced world, we are drowning in a sea of communication. We are bombarded with phone calls, emails, text messages, social media alerts, and breaking news notifications. While we are becoming masters of multi-tasking, we are novices at genuine connection. Listening was already challenging, and our technological world has only added more fuel to an already raging listening problem.
When you first began your work with the launch of The Listening Path®, what was your mission as you set out?
To create a listening movement where listening is recognized as the most powerful form of communication, not speaking and where educators and business leaders put time and resources on teaching the skill of listening to understand.
For centuries, speaking has been taught, rewarded and valued as the primary communication skill, while there is no formal listening education in schools. It is estimated that a mere 2% of people worldwide received any formal listening training. My mission is to bring listening education to all ages throughout the world, while making listening to understand, simple and fun to learn.
What are some of the most surprising reactions or results you have seen through your work, and how has it had an impact on yourself?
The surprising aspect is not what surprises me, but how our clients and students are transformed when they discover what they’ve been missing. As they learn to truly listen, they realize the depth of communication they’ve overlooked in conversations with customers, employees, friends, family members, colleagues, and classmates. It is incredibly rewarding to witness their journey as they begin using the Listening Path® tools.
They quickly discover deeper meanings and insights, experiencing a profound shift in their interpersonal interactions. Listening to understand is the ultimate gift—when someone is genuinely heard and understood. The ability to enable others to give the gift of understanding and to receive it touches me to my core every day.
What do you think is behind the fear of listening to another person, especially if they are different to us? And how do we overcome that fear?
Our brains, particularly our subconscious minds, is our greatest enemy of listening. The subconscious, a powerful force, often directing us without our awareness, holds our memories, impulses, feelings, and biases. This hidden influence can make it challenging to control our reactions and truly listen to different opinions and ideas.
The Navy SEALs have a philosophy that applies well to listening: Many people believe that in a crisis, they will rise to the occasion. However, the SEALs know that, we fall to the level of our training. That’s why the SEALs train and prepare so hard. Similarly, when facing unfamiliar or opposing viewpoints, our ability to listen is determined by our level of listening training and preparation.
You work a lot in education settings, and with young kids. Can you tell us what you have witnessed and learned from working with youth?
Kids are veritable sponges, eagerly absorbing new information and excited to learn how to listen. Unlike adults, they haven’t yet developed poor listening habits that can hinder communication. I often use the analogy, “Would you rather learn to ski at 6 or 46? The sooner you get on the slope, the more fearless you are.” The kids are fearless when trying out their new Listening Path® tools, which has confirmed my belief that it is critical we provide early education to develop strong listening skills starting in elementary school.
For those who might be unfamiliar with the term, what is emotional intelligence, and how does it play a role in how we listen to others?
Emotional intelligence (EI), also known as emotional quotient (EQ), is the ability to perceive, understand, manage, and effectively handle emotions. Higher EQ enables us to navigate the complex emotional landscape of human interactions with empathy, self-awareness, and adaptability. By learning to listen with the intent to understand, we develop the skill to inquire about others’ emotions and feelings, not just the facts of a situation.
Socializing children early to develop this listening language and skill significantly contributes to the development of their EQ. This approach fosters a deeper comprehension of human interactions and emotions, laying a foundation for more meaningful connections and effective communication throughout their lives.
How does your program set up kids to be more resilient, and take on any challenge they may face in the world as they grow up?
Learning to listen is a transformative skill that extends beyond external communication, it profoundly impacts our internal dialogue and self-understanding. By developing the ability to truly listen to ourselves, we gain powerful insights into our own thoughts and emotions. This self-awareness becomes a critical tool for navigating life’s obstacles, helping us understand our inner landscape, process challenges more effectively, and ultimately overcome difficulties with greater emotional intelligence and resilience.
What kind of participation do you see from parents, and how can your program have an impact on families?
The Listening Path® program takes a holistic approach to teaching the skill of listening to understand. Students learn the tools for understanding, while we simultaneously engage the adults in their lives—teachers and parents—in learning the same tools and language. We provide a parent/caregiver guide and connection cards for families to use at home, to foster a listening environment at home as well as at school.
For years, parents have sought my advice on improving their children’s listening skills. My answer has consistently been that parents must first master these skills to model them effectively. It’s thrilling that we’ve developed a method to include parents in this listening journey, and they’re enthusiastically embracing it!
This systemic approach ensures that students are surrounded by a network of adults who understand and practice listening to understand, creating a cohesive and supportive environment for skill development. By involving parents directly in the learning process, we’re addressing a long-standing need and seeing positive engagement from families.
How does The Listening Path® help participants navigate a society dominated by social media and tech, which has fundamentally changed the way we communicate?
Our human interaction and connection time has dramatically diminished due to increasing time spent on social media and digital devices. For every hour consumed by screens, an hour of genuine human interaction is lost. Consequently, our capacity for meaningful human connection is atrophying—much like an unused muscle weakening from lack of exercise.
The Listening Path® offers a critical intervention, providing a structured approach to rebuilding and strengthening our interpersonal communication skills. By teaching the Listening Path® tools, the program helps individuals reconnect, relearn the nuances of face-to-face communication, and revitalize their ability to engage deeply and authentically with others. Just as physical therapy can restore muscle function, the Listening Path® serves as a “communication rehabilitation” program, helping people rediscover the art of genuine human connection in an increasingly digital world.
When you work with businesses, what are the key lessons you talk about in terms of how listening can be a vital ingredient to its success?
Listening silently impacts every aspect of organizational life. Organizations and relationships are systems, just like humans. Listening is like oxygen in the system that helps sustain life. When a human suffers from heart disease, slowly but surely the organs start to die due to the restriction of oxygen flowing through the system.
This restricted blood flow happens gradually and in such a way that is not noticeable, until it is. In organizations and relationships, listening and understanding are the oxygen that needs to flow throughout the entire system to breathe in good health and a higher quality of life. Without understanding, people feel tired, frustrated, and like they do not matter.
What are the biggest things you have personally learned and benefitted from by becoming a better listener?
As a young girl, I learned to listened differently—one that allowed me to hear the unspoken and understand the story below the surface. This ability to listen has been my superpower and the common thread throughout all my successes. Despite my listening attitude, the process of explaining and codifying this complex skill into a simple language and system has elevated my conscious competence in listening, which in turn informs every aspect of how we at the Listening Path® help others learn to listen with the intent to understand.
This journey of translating an intuitive skill into a teachable framework has provided invaluable insights into how we can effectively guide others in developing this crucial skill.
You can learn more about The Listening Path®, buy Christine’s book ‘What Is It Costing You Not To Listen?’, and follow both Christine Miles and The Listening Path on Instagram and Facebook.
