By Ellen Klein
In the age of social media posts, filters, and airbrushing, societal expectations of women’s bodies and sexuality have never felt more restrictive. It’s all too easy to feel as though every inch of your body is being scrutinized, and that perfection is a realistic and attainable goal. Many of us also know all too well the sensation of feeling watched or judged simply for expressing our unique style, personality, or sexuality in our own ways.
Boudoir photography has long been a contentious topic from a feminist viewpoint. There is a widespread misconception that boudoir shoots are inherently objectifying, demeaning, or downright anti-feminist. These are certainly valid concerns, given the world’s centuries-long history of female objectification!
This said, when boudoir photography is approached from a place of self-celebration, body positivity, and agency, it can be a powerful tool for reclaiming pride in your sexual expression and physical form. When approached with consent, autonomy, and respect, this style of photography can also be radically feminist.
The Persistent Impact of the Patriarchal Gaze
The ‘male gaze’ is a concept that refers to how women are perceived and portrayed in the arts, media, and real life. It refers to a perception of women that focuses on men’s perspectives, while demeaning the women themselves.
The biological drive for men and women to view one another and perceive each other’s attractiveness is a natural, built-in phenomenon. However, the male gaze distorts this drive. It views women as passive objects that can easily be acquired, possessed, and disposed of at will.
The so-called male gaze has drastic psychological impacts on women and girls.
Many women find themselves viewing their bodies from an externalized perspective, judging themselves according to the general standards and expectations of the men around them. This can lead to issues with body image and internalized shame. Many women also experience a devastating disconnect from their bodily autonomy and natural sensuality.
The negative effects of this shift in perspective are myriad. Some women scrutinize their bodies and identify even the tiniest perceived flaws. These include natural and common physical traits like stretch marks, hair growth, cellulite, and scars. Noticing these characteristics can create even further pressure as women spend vast sums of time, money, and effort in a bid to minimize or eliminate them.
This pressure is compounded by societal messages that tell women to cover their bodies, to be modest and alluring at the same time, or to only present themselves in ways that the people around them approve of. All these factors work together to create a perfect storm of toxic shame.
The Feminist Power of Boudoir Photography
If you’ve struggled with the impacts of the patriarchal gaze and oppressive societal expectations of your body, you may be eager to rediscover yourself and your sensuality in an autonomous way. Boudoir photography, once maligned for being objectifying, can serve as an invaluable tool to support this awakening.
The key to its potential as a radically feminist pursuit lies in your personal reasons for experimenting with boudoir.
Rather than engaging in a shoot to secure external validation, when you do so with the intent to change your perspective of your body, heal from past trauma, or defy society’s expectations, you can effectively take back your power and transform any boudoir shoot into a truly empowering endeavor.
Choosing the right photographer for your shoot is another essential element in setting its tone. Look closely at how they showcase their work. Are the images diverse in body types, gender expressions, and personal styles? Do they celebrate individuality or conform to a narrow beauty ideal?
A portfolio can reveal a lot about a photographer’s values and the kind of experience they’re likely to provide. By choosing a body-positive photographer, you can work with them to create an empowering and safe atmosphere. When you feel safe, you’ll also feel full control and agency over your expression, allowing your authentic sexuality to shine through.
Embracing Authenticity and Challenging Social Norms
Many women opt for boudoir shoots that are digitally altered after the fact to minimize visible ‘imperfections’. While this is a valid choice, you can elect to take a different route. You can choose an approach that embraces imperfection, celebrates rawness, and captures your beautiful authenticity.
Your photographs can be used as tributes to your real, unfiltered body. They can celebrate your skin texture, your scars, your stretch marks, and every other aspect of your physical form. Holding a shoot in this way can reinforce your self-love and encourage radical, feminist acceptance of your body and your agency.
This approach can help you to look beyond what society traditionally considers ‘sexy’, ‘alluring’, or worthy of attention. By engaging in a feminist shoot, you gain the opportunity to define sexiness for yourself. Through this definition, you can reclaim your confidence and power rather than externalizing them.
A boudoir photo shoot done on your terms can also go a long way in supporting your self-definition. The act of consensually choosing to participate in (and direct) your own boudoir session will shift the power away from observers. It instead centres you as the subject. This powerful process can disrupt your view of societal norms, including long-enforced expectations of what is deemed appropriate or attractive when it comes to the female body.
Challenging expectations and reclaiming your autonomy can lead to lasting personal transformations. It may shift your self-perception and relationship with your body, allowing you to genuinely love your physical form, including the features society criticizes.
Boudoir as an Act of Self-Love
When approached with intention and agency, a boudoir photo shoot can be a remarkably feminist act.
By differentiating between objectification and authentic empowerment, you can reclaim your power over your perception of your body and your sensual expression. You can also challenge societal and patriarchal norms while inspiring other women to embrace every aspect of their being, not for approval, but as a radical act of self-love.
I invite you to explore your own forms of radical self-love and acceptance and to reclaim your power in a world where objectification and criticism continue to be rife. Whether through boudoir or by other means, taking back your agency and choosing to embrace every part of yourself is a truly transformational act that can change your life and set a strong, affirming example for the women around you.
Ellen Klein is a versatile editor who brings a unique perspective to her work, with a focus on financial management, family and relationships, and health-related topics. With a realist approach, she believes in the power of planning for life’s unknowns, bringing her extensive experience to bear on business, family, and relationship advice. When Ellen isn’t editing, she can be found volunteering for social causes close to her heart, or indulging her passion for writing at her keyboard.
