By Sasha Frank
I finally decided to take treat myself to a movie date. I was a bit reluctant to watch “I Feel Pretty” — a film that candidly displays an overweight individual who, after a major head concussion, believes she is the most beautiful person in the world. I was reluctant because I heard mixed reviews and I just didn’t want to pay money for something mediocre, at best.
It was a Sunday afternoon, I had just came from church and I decided to take advantage of this beautiful day (though technically I didn’t take advantage of it, being that this was an indoor activity).
I walked up to the counter and the box office rep said, “What movie will you be watching?” I immediately said, “I Feel Pretty.”
For a moment I shrunk. Did I just declare that out loud— I feel pretty, I thought.
You see I did, in fact, feel extra pretty that day; however, I felt as if it were taboo to confess that to the world—you know, out in the open.
I wasn’t ashamed.
It’s just this type of declaration can give off the wrong impression. For example, this simple statement could make me look like a conceited, arrogant woman. The last thing I wanted to do is make others feel uncomfortable.
Did you know that according to a recent Dove study The Truth About Beauty: “Only 11% of girls globally are comfortable describing themselves as ‘beautiful’? Furthermore, did you know that it is a known fact that “72% of girls feel tremendous pressure to be beautiful.”
In that moment, I felt the weight of the world on my shoulders; however, after this awkward moment — I decided not to even look at the line behind me to avoid stares. I continued into the movie theater.
Combating My Preconceived Notions
I read an article by New York Times prior, and the author pointed out a trend of Beauty Standard Denialism; thus, I had already gone into the theater with a preconceived notion. I had questions, for example, why do I need to be hit on the head to see my beauty? The list goes on.
As the movie unraveled, I couldn’t help but fall in love with this character. Allie’s character went from being pessimistic and negative towards life — someone who could only see her flaws, her childhood wounds, and her curvy body shape — to only seeing the good qualities about herself, not being afraid of challenging herself, and not comparing herself to other people. She became so confident in herself that it didn’t matter if she stood beside someone much slimmer or more talented; she knew her worth, she was confident in who she was.
Exuding that confidence she won over a man — who was initially afraid of saying no to her, and had no interest in her.
Her self assurance let him see her for her.
Her confidence made others believe what she had to say.
Her bravery let the world know that she came to win.
Before the Clock Strikes Midnight
From being overlooked, buried in the background and, unnoticed, Allie’s life changed drastically in the course of a few weeks. She moved to headquarters, she got a boyfriend, and she was finally happy.
That is, until, she hit her head again. Allie no longer saw the beautiful girl sitting in front of the mirror; instead, she saw a woman with flaws. She saw all the blemishes, all the bruises, and all the scars that had built up over the course of her lifetime.
How many times have we shrunk when someone said we weren’t good enough? How many times have we believed that, the only real beauty, can be found on the runway? How many times have we stopped wearing our favorite pair of jeans, lip color, or knitted sweater because someone said it didn’t look good on us?
How many times? Let me repeat: How many times?
There are two kinds of people: those who tear you down and those who lift you up. My friend, the people who lift you up, are the people that you want to keep in your circle. Whether it is your family, your friends or, even a stranger.
Last time, I promise — how many times will you shrink? Personally, I’ve been overlooked for a great majority of my life; but, I am learning that I do not have to be hit over the head to see the beauty that is, well, and a live. All I need to do is change my perspective; to get rid of my negative thought patterns with truth; to understand that I have been handcrafted and made by the potter’s hands. I am beautiful.
So, here I am in front of my mirror finally able to confidently declare: I feel pretty.
Sasha Frank is a creative; a vintage style blogger on a mission to share her journey of navigating life after college. Tune into her podcast here (new episode released every Friday). Author of Introducing Sasha Frank (available on pre-order)
